While the infamous comeback line โsay it to my faceโ has run rampant in society for as long as we can remember, as proud members of The Curvy Committee, weโre here to tell youโฆ the same doesnโt apply when speaking to the full-figured. This is a list of terms that are NOT compliments for plus size women.
As the only (visibly) โoverweightโ person in a social setting, thereโs always this unspoken sense of sympathy from individuals who fail to read the room and overcompensate for their hidden fatphobia. Suddenly, we become charity cases to those of smaller sizes, assumedly starving for unprovoked reassurance and forced generosity. Uncomfortable enough, the backhandedness bleeds through every unfiltered word, with entitlement used as a to-go pass to utter the unwarranted.
The truth isโฆ larger ladies are humans, too, and thereโs no special science on communicating with us or extra niceness required to make us feel secure in our right to take up space. Although weโve let things slide for (way) too long, weโre aware that not everyone sits with ill intent, clutching their pearls at how gloriously round our bodies are and waiting for the perfect time to tell us how obesity is wrong. For that reason, weโve decided to use this as a teachable moment instead.
These are not-so-flattering remarks that arenโt to be confused with endearment and are not compliments for plus-size women.
Terms that are Not Compliments for Plus Size Women and are Unpleasant to Hear
1. Juicy
Holding its top place next to โBBWโ is โjuicy.โ Now, we know what youโre probably thinking. Back in the early 2000s, everything from rhinestone sweatsuits to crossbody bags flaunted this popular word. However, the usage of it is widely viewed as a form of sexualization in the plush community. Because of this, many of us cringe when others utilize it to hop in the DMs and โget their flirt on.โ It further pushes the narrative that chubby women are seen as objects to be fantasized and fetishized.
2. Butterball
If you were the plump little girl on the block, surely, youโve heard โbutterball.โ While most see it as a way to show admiration, referring to a grown-up as (basically) a turkey, can be taken offensively. Granted, with any nickname, we all have different sensitivity levels, but if you asked your local voluptuous beauty how she felt about being called โbutterballโ in her 20s and 30s, you may be met with a frown.
3. Chunky Monkey
โChunky Monkeyโ is not a compliment for plus size women. Itโs not only be childish but derogative. Although being called chunky alone isnโt deemed a bad thing, attaching โmonkeyโ feeds into the stigma that fat people are comparable to the monstrosity of animals. Take it from us, adding this to your โpet namesโ list for a plus size loved one wonโt be the smartest, even if itโs (supposedly) done out of adoration.
4. Pretty Face
Telling us we โhave a pretty faceโ is equivalent to โyouโre pretty for a big girl.โ Saying such a thing could appear as if youโre implying that our value only lies from the neck up, which is false. The plus size girlies are more than โadorableโ cheeks and a cute smile. Letโs normalize letting someone know theyโre pretty, period, instead of only highlighting certain features that meet a socially-accepted standard.
5. Confident
A womanโs greatest asset is indeed her self-esteem, but throwing โconfidentโ at a fellow fluffy every time you see her embracing the skin sheโs in is (debatably) a sideways comment. For many, it comes off as an insult when theyโre sporting a bikini (like anyone else hitting the beach or having fun in the sun would), and they get told how much one โloves their confidenceโ or (even worse) asked how they could be so confident to wear โsomething like that.โ
6. Big Sexy
If โBig Sexyโ is in your vocabulary, remove it and try again. Though it sounds nice, it is not a compliment for plus size woman. Everybody wants to feel sexy in this lifetime, of course, but sexiness doesnโt have a specific weight, nor does it have to be emphasized with that personโs body type. As you may know, this term is famous in the male book of pickup lines. We, the people, vote for it to be goneโฆ expeditiously.
In this era of the body-positivity space, educating those who arenโt in it is our goal here at TCF. Being a big girl in a small world has its challenges, but setting boundaries as a Curvy Cutie is mandatory. Everybody else doesnโt have to like us, butโฆ they will respect us. Weโre no longer giving them any other choice.
Which of these terms do you dislike the most? Let us know in the comments below!
